Having nothing better to do in this hospital room, thought I'd update the known universe on my condition.
Life is the great Teacher. Only Saturday my sitting group enjoyed this Dylan Thomas poem, because I had quoted the first line earlier to Nancy V. (We have two Nancy's most day, some days three. Really.). As I read it aloud I realized how it is about life and death. Now I'm here soon to get scanned for blood clots etc.
But, to my story. One microbe in this colony of seven billion. I woke up yesterday much more short of breath and tired before I even got out of bed. It happened that my annual visit with the cardiologist was scheduled that day. He follows my atrial fib. Struggled to shower and get there, Tom driving. Well, they take difficulty breathing with any exertion seriously at the cardiologist's. And yes, tightness in chest....so this was exciting. Got taken by squad - five guys! - to the ER and so on. Nitroglycerin patch, aspirins, all that. Nobody took a video.
And today much more testing, no blood clots found to explain my symptoms, leading to the startling affirmation that I need to get a heart cath tomorrow. It looks like we will do that, knowing the contrast dye might damage my one kidney and we could have to do dialysis for a while if that happened. But the kidney would probably recover. And that might not happen. If on the other hand a massive heart attack blows out your heart . . . there are no living donors of hearts.
Sunday I had been remembering Torei Zengi's Bodhisattva Vow, so that also led me real-eyes this truth a little more clearly. Here's a bit of it:
Among us, in our own daily lives, who is not reverently grateful for the protections of life: food, drink, and clothing! Though they are inanimate things, they are nonetheless the warm flesh and blood, the merciful incarnations of Buddha.