Friday, December 26, 2008

Year-end review

The year-end review mentality should not be indulged for too long, just long enough to save everything in your inbox in a separate folder titled 2008 year-end, a trick I learned from my daughter, Cassie. There are endless rituals you can use to close out the past; you could throw away all your unmatched socks, though honestly, I wouldn't advise that. You know what will happen if you do.

I find myself thinking sadly of a friend's bad karma, some mental disorganization that may be the result of years of enjoying that harmless pleasure, marijuana, which affects the frontal lobes. Or my own bad karma, the various actions that chipped away at my kidney function. To say nothing of the stock market, or the months wasted on stupid diets.

There is some benefit in reviewing the behavior that led you here - maybe you will change your low-down evil ways - but it is a limited benefit, since the past is only a fiction in your mind (and, you hope, not displayed on the internet).

Truth is, as we grow older we can't help but think of things we would have done differently, had we been born wise. Hindsight. Ouch. A teacher once told me, "You might have to go there, but you don't have to stay there." Foresight is somewhat more useful, though nothing ever turns out the way you imagined (the future is a fiction, too, a dream).

Much more useful is, what to call it, one-sight? seeing what you're doing now. The only moment in which you can take action. Which leads me to get dressed and go to the health club.

I think I won't say Happy New Year, but Happy New Moment.

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