|Reaching for the wind bell|
There is a slot in that meditation for a "difficult" person, which Pema Chodron calls the enemy with a twinkle in her eye. I've never had a shortage of difficult people to choose from. If you do run out, there are always people in the public eye you can wish well for. It's not so easy to pray for someone you see doing great harm. It's not a refuge, it's a practice - I suppose you practice being like you want to be. Love feels better than hate, and it does far less harm in the world.
But just this morning it occurred to me, as if it were simple, "Difficult" means "difficult inside me." In other words, it's not that the individual is difficult or bad per se; it's that I respond to them with feelings I don't like. So I guess that over the years my mind has, with glacial slowness, moved from blaming other people to locating the problem within myself. I can think immediately of one relationship in my life that has been salvaged by gritting my teeth and doing this practice for her. It is no longer difficult to be around her at all.
Not saying I have it conquered. Just wanted to share the thought. I know some of you must do this practice to, and would be interested in your experiences.