A restless night, woke early. That doesn't mean I have to have a bad day. It does make me think I am on screens too much. And that memoir of addiction I finished at 11 pm was too sad and disturbing. Now I know what crack does to people. No more of those needed.
There is a part of our experience we are not aware of. This is not the same as attributing unconscious motivation to misplacing the pulleys I use for PT on my arm. Just rattling around not fully aware will do that. In fact, it's amazing how much trouble you can get into in one second (say, running a light, or kissing someone).
I am surprised by how easy it's been to get back in the habit of morning meditation. It was a habit, and the well-trodden path seems to be there still. I want to add evening meditation. This should be easy, to make it the thing I do when the alarm goes off for my 9 pm pills. I want to research why Zen teachers recommend 25 minutes.
Now. Went to the foot doctor this morning, and on the way, took this
(If you are curious, I'm referring to I am Not Myself These Days by Josh Kilmer-Purcell. It is a very tough book, and I could only continue with it because I knew he survived - somehow without getting HIV - and is happy now. I am not saying I recommend it, unless you want insight into the way alcohol and drug addictions can hold a person.)